I'm not really sure if anyone is reading this anymore....but perhaps you are. On the slight hope that someone will read this, I want to tell you the end of the story of my summer. Let me begin by offering my heartfelt thanks to everyone who has read this blog. I've been amazed to hear how many people have invested the time to share my summer with me through my words and pictures. Thank you so much!
My last week was wonderful. I savored every sight, every smell, every taste, every laugh, every tear, as each moment was heightened by the awareness of impeding finality. We spent Friday and Saturday debriefing as a team (journaling, reflection, discussion, worship) and now that I am back in America, I am incredibly greatful for those two days. The end seemed brutally sudden, but those days of processing our experience as a whole helped immensely to soften the blow.
The memory of Saturday night is the one I will always cherish and carry with me as my lasting imprint of my time in Prague. The interns were all gathered in Mark and Joanna's living room, ready to hear the final devotion. Mark read the story of Jesus washing the disciples' feet, and said a few brief words about service as an act of worship...then told us that he and Joanna wanted to wash our feet. We all looked at each other with a bit of disbelief (a small taste of how I'm sure the disciples must have felt), wondering if they were literally going to wash the grime off our dirty feet from the long hike we took that afternoon. They did, praying with us individually as they washed, giving us a true picture of servant leadership....giving us a true reflection of Jesus. It was incredibly humbling, moving, and beautiful. It wasn't just meaningful because of that one moment, but because it was a tangible reminder of the many ways they continually served us all summer. How thankful I am for their faithful friendship and guidance through those two months.
Our last day, Sunday, felt like a long blur of goodbyes, each one a fresh stab of sadness. The first was precious little Sasha, who sobbed as he walked away from us for the last time. I'm not sure he truly understood the finality of what was happening, but regardless, his cries tore at my heart. After that, each one is still a vivid picture in my mind....hugging Dot, Jason, and the Syvertsons for the last time....then walking away crying from Joanna on a dark street....then rounding the corner until I could no longer see Mark and Lucie at the Prague airport (and subsequently bursting into tears)....then telling the interns goodbye one by one....Michael's final prayer with us, Lindsay driving away with her parents, Hannah stepping off the train, leaving Jeremy at his terminal, and waving to Will as I boarded my plane to Greensboro. When I finally sat down in that plane, alone for the first time, I felt emotionally spent, as though a million bandages were ripped off one after another.
So now I'm back in America, and life feels somewhat surreal. My amazing family and my wonderful friend Sarah met me at the airport with a sign that read, "Welcome Home Kristi" in Czech. I explained that the phrase "vitej doma" was not in my conversational Czech vocabulary, but I could surmise the meaning based on the context! I was incredibly happy to see them, but the whirlwind of sadness and fatigue was still swirling in my mind. The whole night I struggled to surpress tears at random moments that would suddenly remind me of someone or somewhere or something I left behind.
When we all first got back to America, the interns talked about how it all felt like a long dream from which we were suddenly awakened. The whole summer was surreal in my mind...the beauty of epic proportions, the strange quirks of European culture, adventures in city living, being stretched and challanged in ways I could have never imagined. But as I thought and reflected over the next few days, I was thankful for the ways it didn't feel like a dream. The memories and experiences from Prague are vivid and plentiful in my mind and I still feel the ways they are impacting my heart and mind. As the World Harvest Mission Sending Center staff in Philadelphia prayed for the interns this past week, each one of us requested a similar prayer: that this would not be a seperate, compartmentalized, distant chapter in our lives, but that it would be woven in the fabric of our identity and story from this day forward. That is still my prayer today. Prague transformed the way I view the world, myself, and God, and that transformation will continue to evolve as I step back into another realm of life on my college campus. I'm excited to see where the journey will lead from here, as God faithfully continues to gently open my eyes and expand my heart.
Joanna's prayer for me as she washed my feet was that I would go out into the world and continue to get my feet dirty....serving joyfully, loving freely, walking with my King.
So I'm going to keep walking with dirty feet, dancing as a child who is beloved and free.
"The Road goes ever on and on..."
2 comments:
Goodbyes are hard and necessary. Changes are the same way. I'm still reading. Don't stop writing.
you write beautifully.
I am so encouraged to hear this. I can understand that surreal feeling of coming back to the states, where everything is as you left it. Keep everything fresh in your mind, and look back at your journals often! A lot of times I will just close my eyes and visually walk from my apartment to school or by the cathedral or down the river, just to keep it all in my memory. It will remain a part of you. :)
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